A time of self-exploration...

Every summer, I give myself goals to achieve that pertain to dreams that I've always wanted to fulfill. I would vow that everyday I would do something worthwhile and productive, contribute to society. And every summer, it's the same old failure. Because of sheer laziness, I would always end up on the couch killing my time, as well as my brain cells, watching the telly. The summer would pass by, with me not feeling very fulfilled whatsoever.

So as I did the previous summers, I set myself some goals. Along with having different goals, I have a different approach to achieving these goals. Rather than just waiting for the time to give me the opportunities, I am going to tackle these goals head on. One of the lessons that I've learned this year is that I can't ever wait for things to happen; I need to make things happen myself and take things into my own hands. After all, it's my life, I should be able to control what I want in it. And so, with these goals in mind, I will grab my opportunities by the horns and tell them who's boss.

Now that I am back from my time in California, summer has officially started for me. The empty feeling of time and heart lingering within, and having very little, if not nothing, to do. And so I wondered, what are some self-fulfilling achievements I can actually reach, while simultaneously learn about life and myself? Sure, all this sounds mighty philosophical, almost beyond weird for a sixteen year-old to ponder. But I figure my life is short, and if I am going to make the most of it, I might as well start right now. After some time of contemplation during my vacation in California and some quirky incidences in my life, I have thought of several goals to set for myself. And with much luck and determination, I hope to achieve them by the end of the summer (...as well as my AP English homework).

Goal of Self-exploration #1: Learn French

[[photo from ANU]]

After almost three years, I still get nags from my relatives saying "how come you didn't take French? After all, most of my family speaks French, and here I am, the oddball who took Spanish instead. And though I really do love the romanticisms of the rolling Rs of Spanish, I have always had a passion for learning about new cultures, and it's no different for languages. Surely French wouldn't be too difficult with my previous knowledge of Spanish, and it would be quite useful when I spend time in Paris during the Holidays. With the drive to learn, all I need to do now is whip out those How-To books my mom has stashed in the garage...

Goal of Self-Exploration #2: Read a book a week

[[photo from Amazon]]

Sounds quite ambitious, huh? I love to read books, and with the work overload this year, I sadly did not have the time to read as much as I wished to. But with all my horrid classes done and over with, I finally have time to indulge in some fantastic novels. With a long grocery-list of books I want, I'm sure I won't have any trouble finding some new stories to delve into. I am currently reading Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat Pray Love. And I must say, it's quite apropos with my time of self-exploration at the moment. I highly recommend it, and I personally think everyone can take a lesson or two on life from this memoir.

Goal of Self-exploration #3: Crepes galore!

[[photo from flickr]]

Ah, the delectable French dessert. I absolutely love these paper-thin pancakes, and I am determined to perfect the Parisian crepe this summer. Personal preference leads me to make batches and batches filled with ripe strawberries and whipping cream, as well as slathered with lots of Nutella.

Goal of Self-Exploration #4: Italian Cuisine

[[photo from Pesto's Italian]]

Surprised that it's another food-related goal? You shouldn't be, if you truly know me. I'm the biggest foodie a sixteen year-old could ever be. And this summer, I will (attempt to) hone my Italian cuisine skills. I'll be the aficionado of antipasto, the connoisseur of cannolis, the spaghetti specialist, the pizza perfectionist. There is nothing more pleasurable than the taste and goodness of great Italian food, and I am willing to double my weight over the next couple months as long as I can finally make a substantial Puttanesca sauce.

Goal of Self-exploration #5: Euro History

[[photo from Britannica]]

Despite loathing AP US history, I am very intrigued by early European history. Perhaps it's the opulence and enlightenment of the time period, but I can't help but yearn for more knowledge of King Henry VIII and his six wives. Although I already know briefly about each marriage (and in chronological order!), I feel like I could use more learning in that sphere. Also, I am interested in the extravagant fluff that was Marie Antoinette. Sure, the Sofia Coppola movie was anti-climatic, but who can resist the history behind those pastries? Hopefully by the end of the summer I will know the entire significance of the Magna Carta.

Goal of Self-exploration #6: Formula 1

[[photo from Wikipedia]]

At first, I was skeptical about the idea of Formula 1. Isn't it the same as NASCAR? But alas, both are quite different, and after conversing over this with a good friend (who is a huge fan), I am curious and willing to give this a try. Contrasting NASCAR, Formula 1 seems more on the classier side and with much more speed. With the British Grand Prix next week, I will surely give this sport a whirl and will hopefully enjoy this spectacle! (Props to Grace!)

Goal of Self-exploration #7: BLOG!

How else would I learn about myself if I don't know anything about myself first?! Despite the three-month hiatus, I'm back and ready to blog once again. And hopefully through reading my thoughts and ponderings, I will know more about myself and how I should handle my life conundrums.

You might think, What the fuck does all this have to do with self-exploration?! Well, simpletons, I figure that with all these curiosities and intrigues pushing me to experience further knowledge, I might just learn of new passions and what I truly want in life. Sure, gelato might not make my heart love more (...or could it?), but perhaps I will learn of my true potential and what I'm capable of. And hopefully, with new skills and knowledge, I can venture out more into the depths of the world and love it even more.