Adios, 2008.

In less than 12 hours, 2008 will be officially over.  I don't feel any different about myself than I did in 2007, so it's not like I went through this drastic emotional roller coaster ride. Yet something inside me feels like I've moved on from something significantly, like I matured in some aspect. All of this doesn't make sense, I know, but when do feelings truly make sense to someone? As much as I am the same person I was before, in many ways I've changed in some aspects.

Yes, I am still that quirky, football-loving fashionista and food enthusiast. I don't think that will ever change. But parts of me did change. Like the fact that I can't rely on anyone but myself for things now. I feel like there's no one for me to turn to, so I must face the facts of life and move on. I can't make everyone happy in my life, whether it be my parents or my friends, but I feel like as long as I can make myself happy, it's fine. I'm so used to trying to be a people pleaser, that I forget what I truly wish for. And this might sound selfish (at least this is what my parents tell me all the time), but I feel like as I grow up, I need to be more self-sufficient. And perhaps this year was the year that I finally came to realize that.

My self-esteem (or lack thereof) needs some work, I know. Everyone tells me this. Even strangers that I have only known for like a minute. It's not the greatest thing to live by, but it's as if I just can't control it. Perhaps I've been eating up all the crap my parents have said about me, and never realized that maybe they were saying all those things to make themselves feel better, not to help me. It truly sucks that my relationship with my parents have been on the rocks a lot, but I don't feel like it will get any better next year. They are who they are, and the same can be said about me. I'll just have to move on from that. I will try to be more confident, and believe in myself more. Maybe people are on to something when they say that confidence makes life easier to live.

Getting my first job this year made me slightly more independent. I have my own money to spend, and don't have to ask my parents for money to go shopping and whatnot. It's a nice feeling to not have to rely on them for my little things, and it gives me a sense of satisfaction knowing that I bought all my things with my own hard-earned money. 

My first year at C.B. South was, to me personally, an academic disaster. I didn't fail my classes, or get detentions, or anything to that effect. But I know that I can do better. I slacked off, got lazy, didn't do much, and it reflected in my grades. I kind of regret it looking back. But I learned from last school year, and now I'm doing a little better junior year. Which is fortunate, for this is probably the most important year ever in my academic career. As the new year comes along, I will be more determined to get As and get my work done.

Sure, there were the little pleasures, such as discovering Juanes, Spain winning the Euro Cup, Coldplay's new album, and President-elect Barack Obama. Those things make me reflect on the year and smile, despite the terrible emotional problems I had to deal with. And I am so grateful for them, I really am. And I can't wait to explore new realms of culture in 2009.

So, in conclusion, my 2008 can be summed up with: procrastination and self-depreciating. Therefore resulting in a slightly personally lackluster year. What's in store for me in 2009? Completing junior year, spending a big chunk of my summer in France, learning new things, a new president of the United States, and another half of a football season. Usually I am scared of a new year rolling in, but this year is an exception. Although I have loads of homework to finish before I get back to school, I am looking forward to the new year and what it has to offer. It's great to have a chance of start over, to right all the wrongs of the past. And try to be a happier, more successful person.

Bring on the new year. A new Jenn is back in town.

New Years Resolutions

It's that time of year to make unrealistic goals for the next 365 days that I will never achieve!

• Keep my room organized and stop leaving my clothes lying around.

• Do all my homework on time. And actually study. So in conclusion, STOP PROCRASTINATING. If I truly want to have higher than a 4.0 this year, I better work my bum off.

• Meet up with my counselor often to discuss college and scholarships. Better now than later!

• Find more outlets for writing. Hopefully my blog at Bigsoccer will pay off.

• Continue with my short stories. If I must need some romance in my life, then I'll gladly have it in my stories.

• Learn French. Perhaps take classes at Bucks. How will I meet a cute French boy if I don't know the language of Romance? [/sarcasm]

• Spend money wisely. (That means stop buying those damn Milano cookies every week) Can't spend the summer in France with pocket change.

• Try out some new cake recipes. And expand my pasta knowledge.

• Find time to read more. Hopefully I'll be able to read Fever Pitch soon.

• Attempt to exercise. Don't even have to really do it, as long as I attempt it.

• Put my travel book to good use by visiting London. Bonus points if I ever see Emirates Stadium.

• Use my facial mask every week, not just every semester.

• Work on my self-confidence and start to believe in myself. (Longshot, I know). If I want to succeed, I need to believe that I can.

In the words of Barack Obama, Yes We I can.

Thoughts of a Slightly Culture-Shocked Traveling Girl.

To say the least, the south is a lot different than home up in the northeast. I have been here for almost a week, and I still cannot believe that it is late December. It certainly doesn't feel like it here. The houses look a lot different as well. The more I stay here, the more differences I notice and it makes me feel even more isolated than before.

I will admit, I might not be as culturally connected with my heritage than I should be. I know that my family is ashamed of me because of it, as well as other Vietnamese people who have encountered me. I don't like Fish Sauce, or Vietnamese music or the lifestyle. To other Viets this sound like blasphemy, but I cannot control the person that I become. I know I'm different, I've always been different. But as I mature I notice that I'm more a 'twinkie' than ever before. And coming down here, I realize to a great extent how different I am than other Vietnamese. The Vietnamese community here is IMMENSE, tenfold of how it is back home. And it's something that is hard for me to get used to. It makes me feel slightly insecure and not sure about who I am. The stores, the huge population, it's so much more 'Asian' than at home. And it's a huge difference to me.

I do miss home. I miss the pine trees, the ice, the houses that look all the same, the cold wind, the lack of sales tax on clothes, the comfort of having hot coffee with a good book. It's the little things that makes me enjoy home, even if it is the most boring place in the world. As much as the weather is nice here, I cannot see myself ever settling down in a warm climate. I love having four seasons, and the south can only be a mere vacation spot for me.

I'm an east coast girl at heart.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everybody! Hope everyone is had a fun time. I had lots of goodies hear in Houston, and I will probably get some more presents when I go back home!

Things I got so far:

• Macbook (duh)

• J.Crew pom pom ballet flats in 'punch'

• Fever Pitch by Nick Hornby

• Eyewitness London Travel Book

• 30 Rock seasons 1 and 2 on DVD

• Yellow and purple polka dot toiletries case

• A necklace and hair accessories

And what I bought for myself (from Zara):

• Pink bow leather gloves

• Brown baby doll sweater

I got a lot of the things I wanted and more, which I am so grateful for. But I'm even more grateful to be spending time with family that I rarely spend time with. It's great to reconnect with a cousin that I never had a real conversation with before. After all this time, this is our first time really talking, and it's so nice. Life in Houston is definitely different, it's such a shock to not have to put on layers upon layers before going outside. Or not seeing pine trees, but rather some palm trees. Not to mention the vastness of Chinatown. Anyways, this is my first Christmas in Texas, and it's an experience that I'm never going to forget. 

Today my family will be driving over to Louisiana, so maybe I'll update later on tonight. 

Don't eat too many pies!

Football Rant from a Bitter Gooner: Liverpoo* and That Stupid Ref.

So this morning I woke up extra early, attending an earlier mass so that I could watch the Arsenal vs. Liverpool match of epic proportions.

Let's just say, the Liverpool 12th man is at it again.

Meaning, Arsenal had a nice handful of calls, while Liverpool foul left and right getting away with ease. Deja vu, anyone? Oh, that's right, this happens EVERY SINGLE TIME we play against the scouse. Or have Howard Webb reffing the game for that matter.

First half the Gunners were reminescent of their old selves; beautiful passing, playing with an amazing spark and fire. I was so proud and at the edge of my seat. It was highlighted with a splendid goal by my Flying Dutchman Robin van Persie, with a nice assist my Samir Nasri. The goal was no less than gorgeous, with the signature Robin Rocket Speed, Pepe Reina had no chance of saving that ball.

On and on the match went, with Ade and Cesc playing significantly well. I almost had a tear in my eye. Could it be? Noooo....

Well, as the saying goes, The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away.

Robbie Keane scored a goal in hte 42 minute, with our defense looking as horrible as it usually does. Cesc has a knee ligament injury from a tackle by Xabi Alonso (I'd love this other La Selección any other day, just not today), and will be out for about 2-3 weeks. But God knows how long that is in Arsenal time. And Adebayor will not be playing in the match against Aston Villa because of the penalty ban. Sooo our sole playmaker and captain and our striker who we could rely on for goals will be out against a team that is now currently in third place.

We are screwed.

So as this match reached the 90th minute, my disdain for Liverpool has grown even more immense. And Howard Webb will always be a twat.

Arsenal are still at 5th. Nothing changed, still the same ole' Arsenal. I tried watching the Villareal vs. Barca match to calm my nerves, but it only helped a little.

'Til next match, boys.

* that was not a typo; they really are poo.



Almost to Holiday Break....

....and I still have quite a handful of things to do. And too much on my mind. Of course, that is always a time to update my blog with my usual quirks to amuse you with. Let's call it a little present from me to you. After all, it is the holidays.

1. Okay, this could be the most random thing I've ever, EVER blogged about. I mean, who could have thought that I could put football and calculus together? But alas, I found a way. So in class the other day, we were finding antiderivatives of trigonometry functions (sorry if I lost you there), and as I was going to write the function cosecant (csc) I accidently wrote my little Spanish hubby's name (cesc). Either my mind was totally out of the classroom that day, or I just missed watching football that much. Or was it both? I don't even know. And why didn't I make that little mistake last year when I took pre-calc, which was when I initially started to learn this crap? I swear, my mind is something else. Anyways, that was a total *facepalm* moment, but at the end I couldn't help but laugh at myself for being such a dork to write his name instead of the reciprocal of sine. Worst Freudian slip ever? Perhaps, but it got me a good laugh at myself. And maybe, if you would like, you can laugh at that too. Sooth the ego.

2. I am using my Macbook for this post!! The first Mac post in the whole history of La Valse D'Jenn (which is two years worth of blogging with only 1/8 of the comments). How exciting! I always feel so spiffy using this thing, like those hip kids in the coffee shops on their laptops, writing a thesis or something of that matter.

3. I have not done any Christmas shopping yet. If anything, I'm just procrastinator at LIFE, not just school. That is probably a horrible life ethic to live by, but in the scheme of things it hasn't failed me yet. Does that mean that I need to seriously screw up in order to learn my lessons? Usually that is the case, but time usually has a way of leaving me, therefore I certainly have no time to do things. And on top of that, I have quite possibly eight dozen cookies to bake during this weekend (and possibly Monday), and of course, catching up on homework that I was too lazy to work on during the week. See? Like I said, procrastinator at LIFE.

4. I hope, with all my heart, that with this privilege of having a laptop at the comforts of my own desk in my room, I do not become a hermit from my family or life in general. Because my family doesn't believe in 'privacy', which I am a huge advocate of, I must say. This is where my ultimate weakness, time management, comes in. I don't know how I could be motivated to do the things around the house. I have thought of doing to-do lists, but sometimes I feel too lazy to write things down (go figure). Should I try it? Leaving sticky notes all over my room, or even virtual stickies on my Macbook (it's a great feature, by the way, so cool!) If you guys have any motivational tips, do tell. I mean, the only motivational tip I have is having a picture of NYC on my desk as I do homework, so everytime I look up in disappointment as I do homework, I have the picture to remind me of what I'm working for.

5. I have this obsession with Gap. Their classy, sophisticated clothes, those warm sweaters, just their whole aesthetic of the store gives me this warm and toasty feeling inside. And of course, those adorable ads with that plethora of celebrities. I fondly remember last year seeing a humungous Gap ad featuring John Krasinski and was overwhelmed with joy. This year's ads are just as adorable, including this uber cute music video of some celebs singing "Jingle Bells". I am so inspired to wear striped sweaters again, perhaps I'll sneak a sweater or two when I go shopping tomorrow.

6. I will be leaving for Houston, Texas for the Christmas break, from the 23rd to the 30th. I honestly don't know if my aunt has internet access at her house, so I'll try to blog once more before I leave!!

Dear Santa...

...all I really, truly, desperately, with all my heart, want for Christmas...


....is a shiny trophy.


I would ask for two, and maybe a new player in January, and a magical witch doctor to cure all injuries, but that would be too pushy.

Big Mac

...actually, not really. It's only 13 inches. But I'm finally getting that Macbook I've been dreaming up for Christmas! My mom just ordered it last night, and it shall be mine on Friday. No more irritating pop-up ads or sporadic window freezing!


Luckily, the one I wanted was white, which was (for some reason) much cheaper than the black style. Anyways, It's so darn pretty, and I need to get my external hard drive ready for its arrival!

Historical Stylings of Europe.

With my AP European History exam coming up on Tuesday, I should be studying my butt off to get a decent grade. But naturally, I was looking with admiration at the Spring 2009 Read-to-Wear lines. And coincidentally, Chanel and Miu Miu have taken inspiration from the European cultures of yesteryear for some fantastic looks for the upcoming seasons. Chanel totally nailed the Muscovite/Parisian mix perfectly, and those deep reds and golds make me swoon and the embellishments make Fabergé eggs envious, while Miuccia Prada captivated the ancient times with Roman-inspired art painted onto the loosly-cinched dresses. Both collections are basically to die for, and stunning as per usual. No disappointments, indeed.

Chanel Pre-Fall 09



Miu Miu Spring 09

[[photos from style.com]]

Now if only Lagerfeld can be my study buddy for this exam...

Warm Feet

My mom bought me these adorable little mary jane sock slippers from Target last month, but I've already worn them out to pieces! And with the cold really nipping at our bums lately, I think I should replace them with some nice slippers sometime soon. And these cute pom pom ballet slippers from J.Crew are probably the perfect replacements! They look real toasty, comfy, and it doesn't hurt that they are on sale!


They also come in various striped prints and in uber-soft cashmere, but I think I'd totally be satisfied with one of the solid print ones in 'punch'. These slippers are perfect for lounging around the house with a nice cup of hot chocolate.

I'll buy you flowers, I'll pour you wine...

Girls Aloud's new music video for "The Loving Kind" premiered today, and I must say I quite like it! It's kind of Sexy! No No No-esque, and Nadine and Nicola look especially gorge in this! ^____^

Enjoy this satisfying pop tune!

--Jenn

When lack of inspiration equates to procrastination.

Hello lovely readers (if you are out there? I finally update to your request yet I don't see any comments!)! It has been an exhausting Tuesday, and while we are nearing the week hump, it's really exhausting nowadays. To get my mind off the young gunner's eminent defeat against Burnley in the Carling Cup, I will amuse you with my own amusings during the past few hours.

1. I finally ordered these boots. I caved in when I looked at the available sizes, and realized that they were practically selling like hot cakes, and there were only a few sizes left! Luckily my size was still available, so I quickly ordered it before they were to be gone. I'm still a little jittery at paying over $100 for something, but rest assured I'll get over it one day. Man, I need to get used to this internet shopping thing.

2. Today I had Simon and Garfunkel's 'Sound of Silence' stuck in my head all day. How my mind dreamt up this song of the day, I don't know. But I caught myself humming it a couple of times today. I can't really blame myself, it's a fantastic, chilling, and beautiful song. It makes me tempted to watch my The Graduate DVD that I got for my film class essay.

3. With the crisp cold practically freezing our bums off lately, I've been treating myself to some nice cafe au lait and lemon tea as of late. Plus, I've been getting no sleep because of my off sleeping schedule, so a nice cuppa in the morning is a nice invigoration to keep those eyelids open.


4. I've searched high and low for Fever Pitch by Nick Hornby, and I just can't seem to find it anywhere here. I could order it from amazon, but I'm not very fond of spending for shipping these days. Borders has practically all of the Nick Hornby books available, bar this one. This is, with the exception of the laptop, on top of my little Christmas wish list. The inner Gooner in me needs this book, so if anyone sees it anywhere please do tell me! :]


5. I've been lacking creativity lately, and can't seem to find ideas for the postcards to send to Coldplay!! Ugh when will inspiration finally hit me...